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Thursday, August 2, 2012

SEX & LOVE

 "SEX WITHOUT LOVE IS DAMAGING"
*TRUTH*
I cannot say this enough.....Intention means everything.  You need to be very clear whether your intention is to be sexed or to be loved.  Never confuse sex with love.  They can be combined but they are two very different things.  One will damage your worth & the other will heal you.

Many egos try to empower themselves through their sexuality.  These particular egos see it as a way to show how strong, powerful & confident they are.  The message people receive from society & their own ego about their sexuality is that sex sells, sex works, sex will give you money, power & fame.  


Hey.....to each is own so if you're chasing money, power & fame through your sexuality to "feel" fulfilled then I wish you well down that path because that is one tough lesson to learn in life.  Feeling fulfilled & actually being truly fulfilled are two different things.  Fulfillment is not temporary because there is a powerful sense of real peace that comes with fulfillment & that energy never leaves you.  

Insecure people who are unskilled in communicating or expressing themselves in a healthy way always use sex as a form of communication to make themselves feel powerful & confident in life.  If people need to prove they are great at sex then there is a disconnect from their true self.  Being great at sex is something you can train people or animals to do because sex is an act of pleasure that has nothing to do with love.
  
I think people who focus on sex too much use it as a way to prove to others that they are worthy.  They empower themselves through their sexuality & are unrealistically seeking negative attention to fill a void that sex can never fill.  They will always be disappointed.  We all have different definitions of what sexy is.  I personally don't want to be gawked at or felt up everywhere I go.  That's not sexy!!   

We all know when some people are struggling within due to their overtly sexual conversations & behavior.  Yes we live in a very sexual society & world but if sex was the cure to fulfillment in our lives then we would all be humping our way through life.  Ummm......WRONG!  I know for a fact that real love is the best attention that will fulfill your every desire.  Real love comes with real truth, real healthy behavior but also respectful & honest communication from the heart.  

Real love is the total package that offers you real support & a real connection to the mind, body & soul.  Sex is a simple act that can complicate your worth & your life.  Sex always becomes complicated when people confuse it with love.  This is why sex, lies & drama go hand in hand.  People lie to get sex or use their sexuality to sell a lie & fantasy to get what they want out of others.  This is why people who offer sex first feel used because they know they traded their worth for temporary moments of pleasure.  

Sex is the weapon of choice powerless people use to feel like "somebody" because they don't know how powerful they truly are.  They were already somebody special & a gift from birth.  Sex can seem fulfilling to people who are comfortable within their own skin because they have good looks or a nice body but that has nothing to do with love.  You're just being an object of desire through your sexuality.

When love truly takes over to the point where your intention is pure & you communicate honestly from your heart & soul, that is when sex will be fulfilling.  
The reason that kind of sex will be fulfilling is because you've added the key ingredient which is LOVE!  I'm talking about real pure love that can transcend you beyond a human experience.  

That true love that not only transforms your mood but it will balance your mind, clear your thoughts, create powerful energy, grip your body, capture your heart, spin your spirit & clinch your soul in a way that cannot be explained in this lifetime.  That's called LOVE POWER & it is out of this world!!!!


People aren't mind-readers so what fulfills you must be communicated honestly.   If your approach to sex is from the perspective of a horny teenager then sex isn't the issue.  The issue is self love, lack of maturity, growth & worth so that is what you really need to work on.  Too many people have an immature approach towards sexuality.  Many are emotionally scarred from neglect, abandonment, sexual abuse, insecurities about their complexion, their looks, bodies & sex organs which plays a huge role in how they relate to sex & love.  

If your goal is to get off but you have to drastically change your looks, body image, manipulate, lie & tell a person you love them to get sex from them then how powerful can you really be?????  The truth is you are not confident within yourself or your sexuality.  You don't think you can pull life off without using your sexuality.  People who brag about sex crack me up because if "it shines then it don't need light".

Confidence is one of the sexiest things in the world but once again that comes with knowing who you truly are, knowing your value & worth, which is not connected to sex.  I watch people pimp their worth through sex all day everyday.  If your worth is through sex then that will be your focus & end game.


If your worth & value comes from a place of love where you are secure within your mind, body & soul then you will be fulfilled within every aspect of your life including sexual fulfillment.  You will be confident enough to tactfully say what you feel, respectfully express what you desire & what truly fulfills you sexually to the person you love being intimate with.  

The passion, energy, vibe & flow of love will be in alignment when you experience each other.  Sex is what people have to get off & receive moments of pleasure that can provide a temporary release from backed up tension, stress & sexual frustration.  Your worth will not be pumped up through sex only deflated.  Sex combined with real love is a different kind of energy.  There is no tension, frustration & stress.  

There is no regret or insecurity about your sexual performance & hoping to get a call the next day or worrying about your partner bragging about how great it was will not cross your mind.  There is nothing sacred about sex, animals have it all the time but there is something sacred about when somebody loves you for who you are down to your core.   When it is love they will do anything for you & give you the world.  


Real love takes time & is a very different experience from having sex.  Real love can only come from a place of mutual respect for the person you've chosen to be vulnerable with.  Sex is offering your body but love is offering your soul.  You're sharing an energy that can only be created through a bond of love.  I think a lot of people have love acts through sex by being romantic but that's not love either.  

Being romantic is creating an ambiance to make your moments of pleasure go over smoothly.  Anybody can set the tone, create a mood or atmosphere to get what they want out of another person.  I know people can tell the difference between those who are accustomed to true love connections as opposed to sexual connections.

Those one liners & sweet talks while you calculate all the money you're about to spend just so you can have your moments of pleasure has nothing to do with love.  It's just a release.  Love energy doesn't die like sexual energy does.  You have to constantly recreate those sexual moments because it's a chase.  You are chasing your sexual high but love can be made with your clothes on.  Love can be made to your mind.


Love can penetrate parts of your body that you didn't know was alive.  Sex combined with real love cannot be duplicated.  That's why love hurts because when you lose it through sex it's gone forever.  When losing love the energy will be off & the passion won't feel the same.   You will have to create a new love & build a new foundation all over again.  

When people truly make real love, the communication stems from an honest place & doesn't come from a place of shame so you will not wake up the next morning trying to figure out how to ditch the person in your bed or get them out of your home.  You won't feel obligated to do anything because love lingers creating an essence that your heart will soak up & saturate.  You're not just offering up your body you're offering up the core of your soul which is the very essence of who you truly are.  

Sex soils your soul.  People are not satisfied because they keep confusing the emotions that come with sex & love.  Sex has nothing to do with love & if you keep giving sex then that is what you will keep getting.  When you keep giving love then that is what you will get in return.  Never give or offer your love to someone who is focused on sex because it is not about you.  If it's not about you then it will not be about loving you.  Be clear about what you desire & be open to receiving it.  


Love combined with sex is a much deeper connection because it is coming from a spiritual place so there is a more powerful passion that is triggered from within.  Many people are driven by their lower desires.  If you want love & affection then don't have sex.  If you want to be respected, trusted & truly fulfilled then expect real love.  Love floats you on cloud 9 & creates an explosive energy that keeps you lifted in love.  Sex ends after you come. *TRUTH*  You will want to nap or eat then keep it moving onto the next thing.  

This is why people struggle looking for something more while having sex because they thought they made love.  You'll know when you've made love because love calls you & love will consume you.  Love is much more powerful than sex.  This is why many women feel powerless after having sex with the hope of flipping sex into love.  They become upset when things don't work out because they really thought it was more than sex.  You need to be very clear if you desire to be fulfilled because sex will not fulfill you but real love will.  

This is why people believe the illusion of power through sex.  This is why women post racy pics on facebook that says look at my boobs, ass & sexy crotch but expect people to see them for who they truly are.  It's kind of hard when all you see is body parts.  This is why dudes take those bathroom mirror pics on facebook with their shirt off & boxers way too low.  He's not offering you his intelligence.  People do this because they believe if they are sexy or sexual then they are powerful. 


I've learned that you should never give your power away through sex because it can be emotionally damaging & scar you for life.  It will also stunt your growth & show how much you lack emotional intelligence.  If you want power become love.  I discovered that I am powerful through love, affection & being humble not through sex.  

I desire to be truly fulfilled in every aspect of my life so I prefer respect & if I can't get it then I keep it moving.  That is the core of who I am & knowing this truth about myself gives me even more confidence.  We must get past the desire to replace or trade love for sex.  To each is own & you should always do what truly fulfills you but if sex fulfilled you then you would be truly happy.  

Sex is an illusion & love is the truth.  My definition of sexy is staying true to yourself while learning to grow through real love, affection & being humble.  Sex can't offer nothing more than what you already have within in you.  Sex is temporary solutions to permanent problems. Never seek validation, worth & fulfillment through sex because you are worth more than moments of pleasure.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

WELL SAID BINDU

Bindu said...

@ Anonymous.....Thank you very much! ;-)

Anonymous said...

By teenage self could have benefitted greatly from receiving this; I spent a fair amount of my young adult years confusing sex with intimacy and love.

Bindu said...

@ Anonymous.......You are not alone. We all needed these lessons very early in life. This happens to so many teens during our vulnerable years. As teens we are trying to figure out where we fit or belong. I feel there is something that I wrote that most or probably all women can relate to or reflect upon at some point in their lives. Whenever you have the opportunity to share your wisdom & life lessons through positive conversations, please do so. I'm sure many teen girls or other women would love this advice.
PEACE & BLESSINGS to you!!!! :-)